Vampari Diary 2: London Where?

February 2017: London where?

When I say ‘holiday’ I really just mean: spend lots of money to travel to a beautiful city, just to stay in and work inside a hotel room.

I would love to tell you that’s an over exaggeration, but today was spent all day working. Checking Facebook (I promise, it’s for business. Not procrastination. Oh look, what kind of cat would I be? Well, yes, I would like to know.), writing all my books before the deadline (cue flashback to high school where the teacher would say ‘you can’t do this the night before’), and all the other author stuff I got to do. With my trusted laptop (ahem, read: glitching box from hell) and a WiFi connection, I can do my job anywhere.

I probably shouldn’t during a holiday. But I do. After all, the internet never sleeps.

Apart from work, I had another fun adventure with the UK household items.

Not only are the keys and doors weird over here, the showers and sinks are all wrong too.

Why does warm and cold water come out of two different faucets? One hand is freezing over, the other feels like I just high fived Satan. It makes no sense, UK. No sense at all.

But luckily, there is only one shower head in the tub. I twist both knobs and fuck me, it’s impossible to find the right temperature. Swinging from scalding to freezing, with knows that seem to twist endlessly into both directions. So much for a relaxing shower.

It’s not all bad. There are literally over ten places to eat in a 0.3mile radius from where I’m staying. I skip a rather suspicious shop that serves Chinese, fish and chips, and burgers. I love adventure, but I’m not that adventurous.

A quick meal is the only trip I make outside the house, and after far too much food, back to work it is. I troll Skye MacKinnon’s group, watch a bunch of Netflix, and stress over how many books I still need to write. So. Many. Books.

Time flies just as fast in the UK as in Belgium and I give up on work. I’m on a holiday after all.

With the most British sight in front of me, I fall asleep. If you’re thinking about the London Bridge or the Big Ben, you are thinking about the wrong thing. I meant with my eye on a tea station 1 metre from my bed. A kettle, cups of milk, and tea bags. Goodnight UK, I will dream of tea.

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